New Years Resolution

For this new year, I resolved not to get kidnapped so much. Still, only two days into the new year, I find myself bound and gagged. I'm roped to the chair facing my captor. Completely helpless.

The villainess laughs as I struggle against my ropes in vain. I mmmmph loudly through my gag, hoping someone can hear me but my futile cries just make her laugh more.

She pulls out a gun and points it in my direction. I struggle furiously but my pathetic struggles only cause the ropes to twist tighter. A tear falls down my cheek. I know guys aren't supposed to cry but real men don't get beat up and kidnapped by girls either. I'm in extreme distress. No one can save me now.

Just then, my girlfriend rushes in. "Let him go!" she cries as she rushes for the villainess. My sexy girlfriend kicks the gun out of her hands. She then punches my captor in the stomach causing her to crumble to the ground.

"No one manhandles my man!" she says as she gives the villainess a final kick to knock her out.

My sexy angel then turns her attention to me. "Are you okay, honey?" she asked as she loosens my gag.

I gasp for air as I try to answer her. "I think so," I manage to say. "Thanks to you. You saved me. Again."

She hears the shame in my voice. I grew up watching John Wayne and action movies. The hero was supposed to save the damsel. I wasn't supposed to be the putz in peril waiting for my girl to save me.

"Oh, sweetie, don't worry about it," she said seductively as she cut my ropes. "The important thing is that I managed to save you just in time. Now let's get you out of here so you can thank me properly when I get you home safe."

Ok. maybe I'm the guy in distress but I still end up getting the girl. And my helplessness actually seems to be a turn-on for her.

So I'm changing my resolution. This year, I plan on getting myself in distress more often. Way more!

Happy New Year.